In universities, unlike middle and high schools, you can spend time outside of class freely. A student can join a club or spend a day doing their hobbies. I am spending my own time meeting various people from all over the country through extra-curricular activities. However, every time I do them, I constantly feel that they are not making me a more useful person.
  To conduct the extra-curricular activities, I have to submit an application that shows what activities I have been doing and what special abilities I have. There is no organization that chooses a useless person. The application form shows my abilities of making and utilizing contents. Also, it asks if I have done promotions, online or offline, or any other extra-curricular activities. The number of Facebook friends, blog neighbors and Instagram followers are some of the criteria used to define a useful person. The necessity for qualifications and a score for the official foreign language test make me miserable. In order to do the extra-curricular activities and, furthermore, to get a job in the future, I have to prove myself ‘useful’ on the application.
  Our society has become a meritocracy. No one treats a useless person as a person. Therefore, the majority of people try to prove themselves useful and strive to be more useful. Now, having a lot of qualifications and a high score on the official foreign language test have become basic abilities.
  Many people are surprised that I, a reporter of CBT, don’t have any score for the official foreign language test, TOEIC. They think that I am definitely good at English. Therefore, I might have a TOEIC score higher than 900 as I write articles in English. The pressure of their natural gaze on me makes me uneasy. For a while, I thought I should go to a TOEIC academy to become the person they think I am. Moreover, I am constantly beating myself up that I have to improve my ability in English.
  I don’t have any abilities. When I say this, you may think that I have low self-esteem. However, what I’m saying is the sheer truth. I am not a useful person because I don’t have anything special that I am good at. The abilities that our society requires of me and judges me on are constantly emerging. I feel so bitter about living in a society where being ‘useful’ is so emphasized.