What makes people busy? What makes people wander? I’ve always set my goals every day. While doing many routine things, I also started doing new things. Things that I started with some encouragement were crushing my life. There were times when I couldn’t handle things that I had to do because I was pressed for time. I had no time to spend with my friends. When I was in the crowd, I forgot who I was and became just like them. I hated the way I spent my daily routine, which was just dull and useless. I do not like to judge others, and I don’t want to be judged. However, it seemed that bad things would always happen in school. I was so tired and weary of my life that I couldn’t handle it all very well.
  During that time, I suddenly thought of something while studying for an exam. I felt like I would never have time for myself if I continued to live like this. I didn’t even have a chance to improve myself because I didn’t have the time to reflect. I didn’t seem to know who I was. I was tired of working randomly without knowing what I liked or could do well, so I decided to find time for myself in the future.
  The first thing I did was to look back on each day. After a day’s work, I looked back on how I lived that day before going to bed. I recalled the feelings of the day by keeping a diary, not just by thinking about them. Some days, I felt a little happiness just by changing the location of the furniture in my house, and some days I felt good all day reading my favorite author’s books. It became the last thing in my day to keep a diary like that. It soon became a habit and helped me enjoy reflection more. Not only did I think of my daily life while writing in my diary, but I enjoyed thinking throughout the day. Ever since then, the way I think and the way I talk have changed completely. I feel a little more mature, and I feel a strange sense of pleasure that others might not feel.
  The second thing that I started was to choose my words wisely. As the saying goes that once spouted words cannot be picked up again, I thought that, once spoken, words had been taken out of my mind. I couldn’t remember what I had said sometimes. However, if I occasionally try to save my words, the words will stay with me. It is not done to avoid talking to people. However, in the midst of dialogues, what I say can be a means of representing who I am, so I have to be careful about what I say. I don’t judge people by their appearances, but when I talk to them, I might judge them slightly, so I have started to reflect on myself as soon as I speak.
  It was no longer a future goal for me to contemplate. Whenever I got a chance, I focused on myself, and it was fun to find out who I was. My life was continuing as normal, but I just took time to enjoy contemplating it every chance I got. I was pleased that such a small change made my life better. Now that I’m not tired of the daily grind, I can understand myself more easily.
  Moreover, the most significant change is that I no longer pay much attention to other people’s views of me. In the past, listening to a negative assessment made me feel hurt and withdrawn all day. However, I decided to live my own life, instead of living up to the expectations of others. Just because I have my way doesn’t mean I don’t care if I hurt others. I hope others accept me as I am and live their lives their way. I hope that more people will enjoy meditation like me and take better care of themselves.